How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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