Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Randomize
