my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
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