3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Randomize
