the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
