Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
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