forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
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