I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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