I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
You left your phone here
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