I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Randomize