I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
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