Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
FUCK WHALES
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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