Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
