apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize