How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
