3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
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