My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
Randomize
