We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Randomize
