he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Randomize
