Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
Randomize
