once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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