Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(702): View more from Nevada

yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.

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(857): View more from Massachusetts

we have officially mastered the walk of shame

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(925): View more from California

Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.

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(361): View more from Texas

Did i throw a brick at someone last night?

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(360): View more from Washington

I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.

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(803): View more from South Carolina

He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels

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(409): View more from Texas

In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.

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(281): View more from Texas

I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.

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