Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
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