omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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