I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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