I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
