More tranny stories later!
peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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