office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
You have to summon your inner elephant
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
