honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
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