Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Randomize
