What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
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