I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
True strength comes from lack of pants
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
I forgot wine drunk hurts
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
