Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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