Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Randomize
