I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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