Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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