you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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