Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
