I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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