I can't disclose who, but one time I called someone, they didn't pick up, and immediately texted back 'will call later, masturbating'
I thought that was really considerate
saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
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