something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Randomize