Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
where are my pants?
in the oven.
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