Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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