This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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