You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
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