I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
There was a lot of him and a little penis
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Randomize
