Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
