so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
Randomize
