btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Randomize
