sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
Randomize
