He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
Randomize
